Runaway

I had a thought

but it was fleeting…

Tried to catch it, but…

Somehow…

It’s now….

lost in the jumble of thoughts

that ran through my day.

It was a good one

while it lasted

but I could not tell you

what form or shape

it would have been

or what form

it could have taken…

If it were blue or black

or rainbow patterned…

It was a thought, sudden

unbidden, unwritten

and then it left…

Like the wisp of genie smoke

or the curlicue of cloud

or the foam

in a cappuccino cup

from the barista in Rome…

It was a runaway thought…

And I could not catch it…

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Woman

They absconded with your innocence

Before you could breath

And the rivers of tears flowed through

Your birth to your death

Following your footsteps

like the river Styx

They stole your honor before you

Could even hold that pearl

twixt your fingers

And pointed theirs at you saying

Your fault, your fault

The world and all its ills your fault

Because you were born

to be a woman

That jaded old Eve and her sin

You carry in your tainted hands

That old bedraggled Jezebel

And her crony,

once celebrated Delilah

It was Lilith that bore you

So all the sins of the world are yours…

We have always been blameless…

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Sorry

I am sorry…
Youth was wasted on me
Forgot that you…
Could never forget…
Never forgive…
Never know….
The regret…
The tears shed…
The pain felt…
Because I made a mistake…
I cannot undo…
Cannot ask forgiveness for…
Only atone for…
And never be forgiven for….

Why?

Why am I not as important
As that which I carry?
When did I stop becoming
A human being?
What have I been so far
That you would curse me
Abandon me And kill me?
For the sake of a tumor
A node, a thing within
That for the life of me
I cannot yet comprehend
This awful portend
Of things changing
A mistake made
in a backyard alley
Lust filled and quickly hasty
There was no thought of tomorrow
And here, I lie amongst you
Broken, trampled on…
Bleeding in a sewer
Because you blocked my path
To getting proper care
And instead pushed me
To a quack with a hanger
In yet another dingy alley…
Was my life of such little worth
That it was sacrificed
For the one I can no longer
defend against all of you?
I had hoped for better
Among people I grew up with
Surely I, too, had a right to life.
Choose life, choose me…
Allow me the choice to live as well…

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The Sound of Your Name

Echo like a forceful wind
The sound of your name
Comes whipping across
Throws me into the past…
I am left blinking in its wake
Water almost seep through
The cavities of my eyes
As my nose flare
in remembered instances
I am no longer myself…
The sound of your name
Moulds me and shapes me
Whipping through me
And cutting open
The bandages
I had plastered over
Cracks in the ceiling
And now…
The sound of your name
Has ripped them open
Exposing
the mouldering
maggot ridden memories
of what once was
The sound of your name
A hurricane
With gale force winds
Typhoon like…
Destruction in its wake
This sound of your name…
 
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